Joy to the World, the Ford has come!

Well, the Christmas season is over; maybe we won’t have to see the Christmas car commercials anymore. You know, the one where the husband bought two trucks and she takes the masculine one? Oh, and the one where she got him a dog and he gets her a truck? And the one where the family looks out the window and sees the new Lexus amongst the beautiful snowflakes?

Have you noticed how nice the houses are in these commercials? The average house in these commercials is probably north of $500,000. And the couple is always married. Married rich people are a small percentage of America. We need Christmas car commercials for the rest of America. Like, how about a single dad looking out the window of his mobile home and seeing his “new” 2008 Plymouth Voyager or something?

Some used car dealer really needs to do this. I’d watch it. Yeah, you could still have the snow flakes.   

 

New Year's Message from Uncle Tommy

The temperature has been just right lately here for beautiful ice sheets. This is when, at our house at least, water freezes in the puddle on the tarp covering the table on our deck out back. Each day I remove the ice – it comes off in one sheet, usually about 9 to 12 inches wide. It is then my job to determine what person, place, or thing the ice sheet resembles, take a picture of it and text it to friends and family to see if they agree. So far this year we’ve had a lovely badger and, on another morning, the western tip of North Carolina. It’s fun to see what each morning brings.

I would love to tell you that a year ago I found an ice sheet resembling Joe Biden or Dr. Fauci or somebody, but that did not happen. So I don’t think these things predict the future. But if badgers take over western North Carolina in 2021, well, you heard it here first!

Happy New Year!

 

Bad Taste

We are still worried about losing our taste, aren’t we? When’s this gonna end? A few days back I got a quick hot dog – I was in a hurry. And yeah, it was from Costco (I’m still a member). I enjoy an occasional Costco hot dog. I like the rich flavor of the dog, the bun is steamed and surprisingly, you can buy them one at time. (I didn’t buy one there for a long time ‘cause I figured you had to buy like ten.)

Well, this dog today didn’t have the normal rich Costco hot dog flavor. It didn’t taste right. Naturally, I was overcome with Covid fears. So I went back and got some chips to make sure I was able to taste. Yes, the chips tasted normal. They were good. I don’t have Covid.

So yeah, do you think some places are dulling down their flavors to get us to buy more food or maybe pay for a Covid test? When’s this gonna end?   

 

Covid Guaranty

We drove by the mall last night. The place was empty. Less than a week before Christmas. I did go into a store a couple of days ago. Because of the virus my goal was to get out of there as fast as I could. After waiting in line and keeping my distance, I finally got to the cashier. He asked me, “Are you a member of our Rewards Program? You’ll get 15% on your next purchase. It’ll just take a couple minutes to register”. Wait, what? Are you kidding me? Most people aren’t even going in the stores and I’m being asked to enroll in their Rewards Program? I declined his offer.

These stores need to either drop these programs or at least make it more interesting. Fifteen percent discount? Nah. How ‘bout a Covid guaranty of some sort? “If you get Covid from being in our store we’ll give you 30% off your next purchase. (Must bring note from physician.)”

Now I’m listening.

 

Reddi or Not

We’ve still got Reddi-Whip in the fridge left over from Thanksgiving. We all do – don’t we? What a fun product! What other food is there that you can squirt out of a can? 

A can of Reddi-Whip has – are you ready for this? – 37 servings. Thirty seven? That’s 6 pies. That’s a lot of pie. No wonder it’s still in the fridge. So yeah, we gotta find other uses for Reddi-Whip. Here we go:

·         Coffee creamer – Yum!

·         Shaving cream – a little dab’ll do ya

·         Fake snow on your Christmas tree – not for families with pets

·         Substitute for sour cream – this would likely be last year’s Reddi-Whip

Regarding the shave, you’ll have to lay it on its side in you keep it in your medicine cabinet, but Reddi-Whip’s worth a whole shelf!

 

Master Bedroom

 

I think there are two stages of working from home. Stage one is working from home. Stage two is working from your bedroom. I would hope that people could at least leave their bedrooms for Zoom calls, or at least point the camera away from the bed and the dresser. I don’t want to see my co-workers' bedrooms. I really don’t.

I made that comment to a former co-worker friend who’s been working at home for nine months. Well, I couldn’t have inserted my shoe any further into my mouth. He said he never leaves his bedroom for Zoom calls and that his biggest challenge for the calls is trying to remember to put on a shirt. This led to a lull in our conversation. I made a mental note to never facetime the guy.

It’s fun to see these new standards developing, isn’t it?