Where's the Beef?

I spoke to our local sheriff last week. He continues to cut back expenses at our local jail saving us tax payers money. He’s already eliminated the hot breakfast, along with fresh fruits and vegetables. He’s cut out beef. He cut down the number of different dinners from 31 to 7. They serve the same 7 dinners every week. He’s now eliminated condiments - no ketchup, no mustard, no pickles. What’s next? Salt?

As a deterrent to crime, we need to continue to get the word out on how bad the prison meals are. I’ve suggested in the past that the prison menus be published in our newspaper to encourage people NOT to break the law. Yeah, print the same menu every week. Maybe have someone do a prison “restaurant” review. Start some Yelp prison food ratings of some sort. Get the word out!

A while back our local paper ceased publishing the school cafeteria menu. This cut student truancy sharply. So we know this type of stuff works. The menu was scaring kids away. Let's scare kids away from prison.

That's the Brakes

Don’t you love these car recalls where they tell you there’s something wrong with your car so you have to take it in to the dealer and then they find all kinds of other things wrong with the car when you take it in? What a sham! Yeah. Some guy in Detroit says “Our dealerships need more service work. Send out a letter saying there’s something wrong with the power steering.” 

We had a car recalled for a passenger side airbags problem this year. So we took it for the repair. When we picked it up, they said we needed to get the brakes fixed. I of course replied, “Why do I need brakes if I just got the airbag replaced?”

It doesn’t take a genius to figure this stuff out…

Silent Treatment

The subject of Tarot Cards came up today. No, I don’t use them. I’ve never bought one. I’ve never sent one to anybody. I leave that type of thing to Sylvia at her Psychic shop. (They say she’s a happy medium.) So yeah, the pronunciation of the word “Tarot” came up in discussion today. Since I had no involvement with Tarots, I never knew how to pronounce the word. I would say Tarot with a hard “T” at the end. Like Talbot. Or kind of like saying Tater Tot really fast. Try it! Tarot!  

Well it turns out, it’s pronounced tarou. So yeah, the “T” is silent. Wait a minute. Is it silent or isn’t it? You DO pronounce it at the beginning of the word. Can a letter appear more than one time in a word, where the letter is silent only one of the times? Are we going to allow that? C’mon, English language. Make up your mind! You can’t have it both ways. Do we really expect immigrants to learn this mess?

I think there should be silent numbers. “That’s not really my weight. The 2 is silent.”

Frog in Your Throat

After writing the recent post about eating whole fish and whole frogs, I was made aware of a video about how to cook whole frog. No, I’m not providing the link. The video is disturbing. But it has 8 Million views. You read that right. 8,000,000. That’s even more hits than we get on this blog. So, have I missed this whole frog craze? Are you readers a part of this trend? Should I be expecting this dish to be served at Rotary soon? Come to think of it, it does seem like I’ve seen less frogs around town lately…

There’s a restaurant south of here called Kermit’s. I haven’t been there but I’m thinking they may serve frog. I wonder if they have car “hops”?

Chipmunk Chat

Have you ever cut your grass and found holes all around your yard? Yeah. Me too! Those holes are likely from pesky chipmunks. The chipmunk is a cute animal, but it can do damage to your house, and you really do not want them around. So we don’t want to necessarily kill them, but we want to drive them away.

I am here to tell you that chipmunks don’t set paw in our yard anymore! Not one! Why is that? Well, when I would find a hole for one of their tunnels I would roll a small dog log (feces) into the hole. Not enough to block the hole but enough to make things difficult. And stinky. So yeah, it works!

If you do not have a dog, perhaps you can borrow a log from a neighbor or pick one up on a walk. Of course the ultimate solution here is to get your dog to “go” directly into the hole. Take your dog for a walk on the golf course to perfect this skill.