Uber

My wife and I were on vacation recently visiting our son. While we were waiting for him to pick us up in front of our hotel we saw an older couple struggling, apparently waiting for their first Uber. Like watching a baby take his or her first step, or seeing a baby robin fly from the nest, this was fun to watch. So, you’re wondering, why didn’t you help them, Uncle Tommy? Why? Why did you just watch?

Because they got their ride fairly quickly. Calm down. But it was touch and go for a bit. Picture Frank and Estelle Constanza trying to get an Uber. At one point the wife told her husband, “I think you need to be out in the street more”. I’m sorry man, but this is one of those phrases that never work, whatever the age, whatever the context. To you younger readers (and readers of all ages): Let’s try not to use this phrase.   

What is HIPAA

So yeah, when you’re sitting in the waiting room at the doctor, they call you in by first name. HIPAA says your privacy is violated if they use your last name. If there’s a bunch of people in the waiting room, and you have a common first name, chances are pretty good that you’re gonna have some false alarms – times when your name is called, but it’s for somebody else. So, if you have a common name like I do, you may want to give yourself a nickname. This eliminates those awkward false alarms.

I want to know how HIPAA deals with the FNOP’s (first name only people). If they don’t have a last name, isn’t their privacy violated when they are called by their first name? Have any of you readers been in a waiting room with Madonna or Cher?

When Sting gets called in I bet there’s always a kid with a bee sting who stands up.

Waiting Room Etiquette

I was at the doctor’s office the other day.  Don’t worry, I’m OK. (We always get lots of letters when I mention the doctor.) There was just me and one other guy in the waiting room. After a couple minutes a nurse opened the door and called “Tom”. We both stood up to go in. What were the odds of both of us having that name? Well this time I was the winner, and I got to go back before him. My visit was brief. (I really am healthy.) When I came out, he was still there in the waiting room. I didn’t say anything to him.  

In a situation like that, should I have addressed him by name as I was leaving and said something like, “See you later, Tom.”? Or “Good luck, Tom.”? What’s the proper etiquette in that situation?

Follow Up Holidays

We don’t do a good job in this country with “follow up holidays”, days that follow a holiday and, frankly, deserve some recognition. I’m sure there’re more out there but here’s a start:

• Dentist Day (November 1^st) – This is the day you end up taking your child to the dentist after he or she fall victim to Dots, or JuJubes. Dentists leave these dates open ‘cause they know the kids are coming…
• Corned Beef Hash Day (March 18^th) – Why not stir up a delicious pan of corned beef hash on the day after St. Patrick’s Day? You’re gonna have leftover corned beef.  And you might have people crashed at your house who need to be fed. Even if you don’t know who they are – what better way to get to know them!
• Six Weeks Later Day – (March 16^th?) If the ground hog sees his shadow, there’s six more weeks of winter. Well, when exactly are those six weeks over? Is anybody tracking this? Hello?

Mark your calendars! And somebody call Hallmark.

Forward Thinking

Have you ever sat behind one of those forward leaners in an auditorium or sporting event? You don’t see the stage or the field do you? Some of these people lean forward for the whole movie or the whole game. Do these folks not understand that the whole seating design only works if you lean back in your seat? What’s with all this forward leaning? Do these folks not have seat backs at home? Do they have stool seats in their cars? The obvious solution is to identify these forward leaners, and have them sit together in a special section. Let them sit behind their peers and experience what we’ve experienced...   

I sat behind a forward leaner at “Wicked” a few years ago. We were in the back row of the balcony. This leaner was big. How big, you ask? He so big that not only could I not see, I couldn’t hear. The guy absorbed most of the sound. That’s big. I hear it’s a great musical…

Flu Shot(s)

I heard a medical presentation last week and the speaker said that apparently the flu season has been mild this year compared to previous years. But he said that this time of year is “not too late still to get a flu shot”. One of the questions after his presentation came from a woman who asked, “Since everybody else gets a flu shot, do I really need one?” I thought that was an interesting take on flu shots. I give her credit.

But knowing there are people like her around really makes me want to be extra careful and get two flu shots. I think I’ll stick both arms in the Rite Aid drive through window next time I get my shot(s).